


she is good at this, she thinks (being rational)

by raihaqyaza



Category: NU'EST, PRISTIN (Band), SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Al1 Era, Canon Compliant, Gen, Leader line, Light Angst, Mention of Broduce 101, Mention of Orange Caramel, Nu'ventin, Pre-If You, Pre-We Like
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-16
Updated: 2018-02-16
Packaged: 2019-03-19 13:04:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,429
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13705038
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/raihaqyaza/pseuds/raihaqyaza
Summary: She envies her members for not caring, envies them because she, too, wants to let go but Dispatch is a threat even inside the security of her company’s building. So she remains distant, although it claws her insides to do so.





	she is good at this, she thinks (being rational)

she is good at this, she thinks (being rational)

by

raihaqyaza

disclaimer: they're not mine, none of them are (unfortunately), and i earn no profit whatsoever from writing this piece.

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Im Nayoung is nothing if not calm and composed – or that is how she tries to appear on TV, plus a little extra of variety skills that she picks up here and there every now and then to help bring more attention to Pristin. However, once the PD says that everything is a wrap and they can all head home, Im Nayoung is distant and envious. Not in a bad way, no. At heart, she is a mother hen and loves her members very dearly and equally. Her distance and envious nature only comes because she’s a rational person and leader. She is good at this, she thinks. Being the rational one of them all. She is never going to be like Seungcheol, who is always fierce and hot headed, who treats his members more like family than co-workers. She is also never going to be like Jonghyun, who is a natural and attracts people with his charms without knowing the effects that he has on people.

But that’s okay, she tells herself all the time.

Being rational is good. Being rational led her to where she is today, a former Nation-made girl group and the leader of present hottest girl group rookie. She is leading her members to 3 potential rookie awards and the CEO is very happy with their current fame and achievement – rational is good.

But then she trails after her members sometime in early July into Pledis building and catches a laughing Kyulkung in her peripheral vision as she makes her way to Dongho and Minki, who seem to just arrive and are hanging out with Seventeen, who also has a schedule that day. In another side of the room, her eyes catch Jonghyun and Seungcheol, making fun of Xieyon, like they always do every chance they get. If she looks further, she will spot Sungyeon chatting away with Jisoo and Aron in English.

This brings Nayoung back to present moment, where, again, she would like to stress that she is envious, because she misses them, misses being able to talk with the Nu’est members as a friend rather than as a co-worker, misses being teased to no end on the head by Seungcheol every time she makes some overly serious or blunt remarks, misses the trainee days when they were all able to have fun as the backup dancers for Orange Caramel or other Pledis seniors. She envies her members for their young hearts that give no thoughts whatsoever about the company’s rule, envies them because she wants to let go but Dispatch is a threat even inside the security of her company’s building.

So she remains distant. She nods politely and listens when being spoken to, but she is rational and so she lets her face remains stoic even when sometimes all she wants to do is let her heart out, especially during moments like when she had to witness Jonghyun’s smile when he, out of all people, was announced as rank 14 in Produce 101.

She swipes another look across the room, glances at the clock above the receptionist table, and clears her throat, “Girls, let’s go, we have a comeback to prepare for.”

15 minutes is enough, she thinks. It’s safe. Not too long to make people suspicious with what’s going on between those who started breaking into pairs (Yebin and Hansol), and not too short to make people think Pledis is a strict company that bans communication between male and female artists.

Her girls, bless them, listened and starts saying goodbyes, wishing best lucks to Seventeen members for their upcoming world tour and to Nu’est members – she refuses to call them Nu’est W just yet – for the single they’re about to record as a unit.

They all excitedly make their way to the dance studio and Nayoung starts to follow after making sure none of them are trying to linger for a minute or two. Usually Xiyeon, because although she refuses to admit it, Nayoung knows she likes being treated like a princess by the original Pledis Boys.

“Nayoung-ah,” a familiar voice calls for her.

Nayoung turns and finds Seungcheol with his charming gummy smile directed towards her. Next to him is the rest of the Nu’est members. The rest of Seventeen members are going crazy in their own little world.

“What do you say we hang out to your parents’ restaurant to celebrate your comeback? All of us,” he gestures eagerly to his members and the Nu’est's, too.

She tries to not be taken aback by the invitation, to her parents’ restaurant, no less. She misses them and it is a good place to hang out. The media will not think anything of it because if they do find out, they will simply put it as a kind-hearted gesture towards Seventeen and Nu’est’s sister group. She misses them and it should be safe, should be okay.

The word yes is on the tip of her tongue, but then she catches Jonghyun’s smile and sobers.

(To her, Jonghyun's presence is a constant reminder of how unpredictable the future is.)

Nayoung is rational and she thinks it’s too soon. Her group is new, she can’t risk the media catch the adoring look Dongho always serves for Kyulkung, can’t risk the media plaster a liberal image to Aron, Sungyeon, or Kyla’s Western culture, and definitely can’t risk the media twist Seungcheol and Xiyeon’s sibling-like affection into something entirely different and wrong.

So she reasons, “You will be gone for the world tour by then.”

His grin fades, and Nayoung thinks she still knows him, even after two years of treating each other more as strangers than friends who share similar hardship. She knows he doesn’t like being reminded of his success, not in front of his fellow Pledis Boys trainees.

He clears his throat and shrugs, “We can go after that.”

Nayoung smiles, polite and stoic. “Then that won’t be celebrating our comeback, no?”

Seungcheol’s expression hardens, and Nayoung pointedly ignores Dongho’s warning look. Seventeen being the only money maker is a sensitive topic for all of them, Nayoung knows. It’s unfair for her to use his success this way, because truly, she is happy and proud for them, but it’s necessary for her to protect the girls. She tries to stare down Dongho’s fierce look as her insides scream, why can’t he, of all people, understand how harmful little words from little people can cause?

“Sometime later, then, maybe after Pristin wins the rookie award or something,” Jonghyun cuts in, all civil and kind.

“Unnie, I thought you want to practice?” Xiyeon hollers down the hall, her voice echoing through the walls.

Nayoung looks back to where Xiyeon and Kyulkung are waving at her, and hastily nods to the boys as she makes her way to leave. “If we win against— _the others_ ,” she clears her throat and pretends to catch herself.

It pains her, it really does, but she needs them to distance themselves. It’s too soon and Nayoung is rational.

Jonghyun’s smile stiffens at the reminder of Pristin’s up and coming nation-wide famous competitor.  

The stare he gives her makes her want to stop, duck, scuffle her feet to the ground, and apologize, because of course the nation leader has that effect on people, but she meets his look evenly because she is a leader of her own now and even if her hardships might not compare to his, she gets to do this, gets to care for her members the way he gets to do the same for his.

“I should go to practice,” she gives them a final nod. “Good luck on the world tour and the new single.”

Without waiting for a response, she turns and meets Kyulkung’s knowing look and Xiyeon’s disapproving one with a pleading gaze to drop the matter. She pulls them into a hug as she enters the dance studio and immediately goes to her position in the center for ‘We Like’.

She smiles encouragingly at their reflection in the mirror and sees her members’ determined expression. She needs to bring them to the top, she thinks. Until then, she needs to remain distant. She may envy how easy her girls can behave with one another, it may claw her heart every time Seventeen and Nu’est’s easy interaction catches her eyes, but this is her.

The rational, distant, and envious, Im Nayoung.


End file.
